The “not so super” working mother

After reading various blogs and articles on how to be a super working mother, I have concluded that this is simply not possible, at least not for me, at this stage of my life.

Keeping up 

With a small toddler and a full time job, I sometimes feel as if I’m only just managing to keep up with life. From what I’ve heard from mothers with older children, it doesn’t get any better as they are faced with a multitude of after school activities and homework.

The ideal super working mother

There seems to be a largely fictional creature that is the super working mother. She is a super achiever both at work and at home.

At work, she climbs the corporate ladder at an astonishing pace. She makes valid contributions and her work is always stimulating.

At home, she’s got well-behaved children who are always clean and do their homework. They are high achievers at school. She manages her household with an iron fist and the house is always perfectly clean and neat. She cooks delicious meals for her family.

She eats only small salads and has the body of a teenager at 40 years old.

This super woman also has the perfect relationship with her husband and he values her for her super qualities. They somehow manage to spend a lot of time together, even though they have three children.

My reality 

If you are like me, the reality is more like the following:

  • I have a lovable, but cheeky little boy. It’s a challenge to get him to listen. Luckily he’s too small to have homework yet. 😛
  • I can’t cook and my house can get incredibly messy, especially when I get home late every night and I’m busy over the weekend.
  • I eat chocolate when I stress and I’m overweight, as I also have no time for exercise because of my long commute to work every day. I keep losing a few kilos and then picking them up again. I vow to lose a lot of weight – someday soon. 😛
  • I love my husband, but we don’t really get to spend enough time together, because of our work, travel and child rearing activities. We try our best. Luckily we share a weird sense of humour which binds us together.
  • Work – I try my best, but there’s been days, especially since having a child and getting little sleep, that I spend most of the day staring at my laptop screen and procrastinating around the actual work that needs to be done. The fact is, if I’m too tired, I can’t focus and be productive. Some days I’ve been effectively useless, but the reality is that you still have to go to work to earn an income.

So for now, I think I’m just going to have to do the best I can.

Maybe taking small steps will put me on the road to becoming a super working mother (not). 😛

The Observer

I am an Observer. Like the Observers from the science fiction television show, Fringe, I am stoic and calm. Possibly monotone even.

Misunderstood

I think people often misunderstand me. I may come across as conceited or unwilling to become involved. But actually I’m just watching them and trying to make sense of their behaviour. And spending too much time with too many people just drains my energy resources.

Time traveller

I have the tendency to withdraw from the environment around me, as there is the sense that I might change something that is supposed to happen, if I become too involved. Almost like a time traveller from the future.

I’ve learnt from past experience that if someone is on a certain course, it’s best not to get in their way, as there is very little you can do to change their fate.

Interesting people

On the whole, I just find people so interesting and very different from myself. They make so much noise. 😛

Some people are meant to entertain the world and I am their audience.

Sense of power

It also gives you a sense of power if you share your true self with only a few people. There’s a certain satisfaction in keeping quiet about a contentious issue when everyone else is giving loud and eager feedback. 😛

Introvert

All this has probably got a lot to do with being an introvert.

I just want everyone to be real and honest, so social settings with complex undertones just stress me out.

The verdict

I actually do like people, just in small numbers and far away. 😛